Sunday, March 7, 2010

Zero Tolerance

In an alternate universe this blog would focus exclusively on capital punishment and the war on drugs. (I am really fun to be around in that universe.) But in the interest of my own mental health, I try not to devote myself to cataloging stories like this one about how a middle school suspended a seventh-grader for a week for touching a pill--a pill that she had been offered and refused (found via). Even worse than the insanity of punishing people for doing exactly what they're constantly harangued to do is the infuriating illogic employed by the school's administrators who can do no wrong in the holy war against drugs:

"According to Greater Clark County Schools district policy, even a touch equals drug possession and a one week suspension. 'The fact of the matter is, there were drugs on school campus and it was handled, so there was a violation of our policy,' said Martin Bell, COO of Greater Clark County Schools. We wanted to know what would have happened if Rachael had told a teacher right away. Bell said the punishment would not have been any different. District officials say if they're not strict about drug policies no one will take them seriously."

Yes, I'm sure that now Rachael knows drug policies are applied without any sense of reason entering into the equation, she will take them much more seriously, especially the only good lesson to be learned here: don't snitch.

Pictured above: artist's rendering of the chain of evidence (taken from Wikipedia).

6 comments:

  1. Oh, very sensible! I'll bet she got a contact high off of that pill. They should send her to rehab, just to be safe.

    ReplyDelete
  2. If I were her, I'd spend my week off down at the doctor's getting an Adderall prescription. Can't be that hard right? She's clearly a troubled youth, being suspended and all.

    ReplyDelete
  3. You touched a pill?! NO LEARNING FOR YOU

    ReplyDelete
  4. She didn't snitch.

    Learn to read, idiot.

    ReplyDelete
  5. Since you are my first ever troll, I will explain this to you nicely. "We wanted to know what would have happened if Rachael had told a teacher right away. Bell said the punishment would not have been any different." In other words the COO of the school district is saying that even if she had snitched--and I am aware she did not--they would have punished her anyway. So the message the COO is broadcasting by saying this is that it's best to just keep your mouth shut.

    ReplyDelete
  6. Hmm, this looks like the work of the nefarious "Nick C."

    Anonymous, my butt.

    ReplyDelete